Thursday, January 03, 2008

The History of the Universe in 200 Words or Less


Quantum fluctuation. Inflation. Expansion. Strong nuclear interaction. Particle-antiparticle annihilation. Deuterium and helium production. Density perturbations. Recombination. Blackbody radiation. Local contraction. Cluster formation. Reionization? Violent relaxation. Virialization. Biased galaxy formation? Turbulent fragmentation. Contraction. Ionization. Compression. Opaque hydrogen. Massive star formation. Deuterium ignition. Hydrogen fusion. Hydrogen depletion. Core contraction. Envelope expansion. Helium fusion. Carbon, oxygen, and silicon fusion. Iron production. Implosion. Supernova explosion. Metals injection. Star formation. Supernova explosions. Star formation. Condensation. Planetesimal accretion. Planetary differentiation. Crust solidification. Volatile gas expulsion. Water condensation. Water dissociation. Ozone production. Ultraviolet absorption. Photosynthetic unicellular organisms. Oxidation. Mutation. Natural selection and evolution. Respiration. Cell differentiation. Sexual reproduction. Fossilization. Land exploration. Dinosaur extinction. Mammal expansion. Glaciation. Homo sapiens manifestation. Animal domestication. Food surplus production. Civilization! Innovation. Exploration. Religion. Warring nations. Empire creation and destruction. Exploration. Colonization. Taxation without representation. Revolution. Constitution. Election. Expansion. Industrialization. Rebellion. Emancipation Proclamation. Invention. Mass production. Urbanization. Immigration. World conflagration. League of Nations. Suffrage extension. Depression. World conflagration. Fission explosions. United Nations. Space exploration. Assassinations. Lunar excursions. Resignation. Computerization. World Trade Organization. Terrorism. Internet expansion. Reunification. Dissolution. World-Wide Web creation. Composition. Extrapolation?

Eric

6 comments:

  1. That was incredible

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  2. But what about wine and the spice girls :)

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  3. Plus the message needs to be repackaged. On the first day quantum fluctuation etc. On the second day. . .

    :)

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  4. From time to time I'm tempted to add "fermentation" to the Revised History of the Universe in 200 Words or Less. That would take care of wine. What would be a good -ion for the Spice Girls? There's also a Biblical History of the Universe in 7 Days or Less, for those who are interested.

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  5. Hi Eric-

    my suggestion is to add Endosymbiosis followed by Multicellularity... to the list... can't manage to think of a way to give them the correct suffix. Maybe change them all to "-sis"??
    Spice girls - what about "Trivialization"?

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  6. Eric,

    here's my biblical synopsis in less than 10 words:

    "God creates Man, and everything Man does pisses God off.".

    Cheers!

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Whaddaya think?